You have the typical holiday traditions — stuffing ourselves with turkey and stuffing until we're sick or having heated political debates at the dinner table with our uncle.
You know, typical holiday fun and cheer. But let's talk about the other holiday traditions, which are a tad naughtier — you know, what you're not talking about at the dinner table with grandma.
The holiday season is magical. The Christmas spirit is in the air; it's cold and snowy outside, and all you want to do is be with your partner. But that doesn't mean you need to just watch Christmas movies on Netflix — it's time to take these holiday traditions and turn them up a notch.
So, if you want to add a little spice to the holiday season and create your own naughty (and some sweet) traditions with your partner, now is the time.
Kinky Christmas morning love letters
You know they say, start the morning off right. Why not write naughty love letters telling each other what you want them to do to you today?
You can say something like, "I can't wait for you to bend me over the kitchen counter and fuck me from behind." The best part is if you both work, you'll need to wait until you both come home —oh, the anticipation.
Decorate your Christmas cookies (the naughty way)
Who doesn't love Christmas cookies? Get you and your partner to bake some holiday cookies together—it's a sweet tradition. But here's the thing. Decorate it with what you want done to you or what you want to do to your partner.
For example, write "blow me" or "lick pussy” on your cookie. And when you two are sitting by the fire, ready to indulge in the cookies, well, you'll need to follow the rules.
Play a game of sexy Christmas bingo
Who doesn't love a game of bingo? Okay, but this isn't your ordinary bingo, I'm talking about sexy Christmas bingo. This can be a fun and naughty tradition you do every year.
Your Christmas items can include: kissing under the mistletoe, role-playing in Santa-costumes, having sex to Mariah Carey's Christmas song, and playing a game of kinky dice — you catch my drift.
Stuff something naughty in their stocking
Before Christmas, fill your partner's stocking with something a little naughty. Maybe a Lumen butt plug or some extra smooth lubricant — is that too strong of a hint? While that may be the gift, the real present is using it together on Christmas Eve.
12 days of kiss-mas
Oh, the 12 days of Kiss-mas — haven't heard of it before? For the 12 days leading up to Christmas, you and your partner need to kiss each other differently (this includes kissing in a different place). And the thing is, you can't kiss the same place twice, so you two will need to get really creative.
Make a naughty advent calendar
While most advent calendars are stuffed with chocolates, you can have a dirty version. Sure, you can go all out and buy a kinky advent calendar, or you can make one yourself.
You two can write down different sex positions or activities on a piece of paper and randomly put them in your advent calendar.
Wrap each other up
You and I both know there are lots of places on the body where you can put a bow. Ribbons and bows work wonders, but you can also be a little creative and maybe even use some festive wrapping paper (all penises are gifts, no?).
Or, completely wrap yourself up and write something cute on the card like, "Someone made it on Santa's naughty list." You'll be unwrapped in seconds.
Use Christmas-themed massage oil
Baby, it's cold outside. So why not make a tradition of warming each other up every holiday season? Bring out some festive holiday-scented massage oil, and let the fun begin!
They massage you, you massage them — just make sure that it won't burn in case it…well… gets inside of you. I'm just saying, massages never end at just a massage.
Hang mistletoe — and use it!
We all know how symbolic mistletoe is, and yet, most of us don't even have it hanging in our homes during the holidays. So…why not bring this Christmas tradition to life?
Mistletoe is known as a fertility herb, so just a warning: if you're going to hang it up, make sure you wear protection (unless baby-making is the plan)!
Bring out the festive role playing
What's the point of Christmas if you're not going to dress up as Mr. and Mrs. Claus and have some kinky North Pole sex? I mean, why waste a good holiday? Buy some Santa costumes, slap on a beard, and go down on Mrs. Claus as if the North Pole is melting.
WRITTEN BY
Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and author of her short stories on TheLonelySerb. She completed her first degree in Criminology and continued and finished her Masters in Investigative Psychology, but then decided to follow her true passion of writing.
Discover more of Natasha's Work
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