Tantric sex was always a thing - at least in the East (and trust me, there’s tons of research on it). While it did seep slowly into the Western world, it wasn’t until these past couple of years that Tantra started to become mainstream.
If you’ve done some reading about Tantra, there’s one thing you’ll notice - it’s all about connecting with your physical self. So, how can you incorporate tantra into your relationship if you’re in a long distance one? Good question.
But don’t worry, we got it all covered. Whether you’ve either known about tantric sex and want to sharpen up on your skills (gotta stay on top of your game!), or you accidentally watched a Tiktok about sex toys and tantra sex and it piqued your curiosity - you’ve come to the right place.
What is tantra sex?
Today, there are tons of people practicing tantra, all using different techniques from either Hinduism or Buddhism. It doesn’t matter which stream you choose, they both have the same foundation: Tantra is about sexual connection, mindfulness, and celebrating the sacredness of your body.
It’s about letting go of your ego and immersing yourself fully into the moment with your partner, weaving together the masculine and feminine energies and aligning them in the act of sex. The point of tantra is taking sex beyond just the physical; instead, sex becomes empowering, healing, and transcendent.
It sounds good, right? But I know you may be thinking, how the hell am I going to do that? Listen, everyone starts at the beginning - tantra masters didn’t become masters without trial and error. So, don’t worry about it.
How to get into tantra sex
Just reading this is your first step! You can’t get into tantric sex unless you start learning about it to get an idea of what it is. And, you’re already doing that. So, what can you do to get started?
1. Create an intimate and safe space
To really dive into tantric sex, you need the world around you to disappear. Turn off all devices, light some candles and choose a room without distractions. Clean up the space you choose, making it inviting and clutter free.
You want to create a space for safe tantra sex. And most importantly, set an intention for this session of tantra sex. For example, it could be “to show your body how much you love it” or “to explore your body (or your partner’s body) more deeply”.
2. Engage in eye contact and intentional touch
Start off by gazing into the eyes of your partner, revealing yourself fully to them. Letting them see you for all that you are. Hold this gaze for a couple of minutes and when it feels right, intentionally bring your hands to your heart, maintaining eye contact.
Then place your right hand on your partner’s heart and have their hand on your heart. Breathe together, slowly, deeply. Do this for about 10 breaths.
3. Begin with tantra massage
You don’t jump into tantra sex right away, you slowly build up it. Now, you or your partner lie down, while the other partner will slowly move their hands along their partner’s body, sending sexual energy throughout.
You can experiment with different massage techniques like yoni massage, lingam massage, or tantric nipple play. But if you’re completely new to this, just start off with basic touch.
4. Practice some classic tantra sex position
You’re not going to become a master at tantra right away - it’s going to take practice (and in this case, it’s practice you’re going to love doing). The basic position is where one partner (the penetrating partner) sits crossed-legged and the other partner straddles them.
The receiving partner can wrap their legs around their partner’s waist, embracing each other with both arms while being penetrated. This position is ideal because you can engage in deep eye contact and synced breathing.
The goal is to bring the orgasmic energy from your pelvis all the way up to your third eye (right between your eyebrows).
How to have long-distance/solo tantric sex
Tantric sex sounds amazing, right? Well, how does it work for long-distance couples? Or for solo play? Is it even doable? The answer is yes, but it’ll take a couple variations to make it work.
Essentially, you can follow the same steps, but here are a couple of things you’ll need to change.
- Can you engage in eye contact with your long-distance partner? Of course, but you’ll need to set up your computer or phone beforehand so you can engage in eye contact comfortably (you shouldn’t be holding your phone).
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While you may not be able to physically receive or give your partner, that doesn’t mean you can’t feel them. Using sex toys like long-distance couple sets allow you to feel each other no matter how far apart you are from each other.
- For solo play, you can do everything listed above, but using the Kiiroo Titan VR set can let you practice tantra sex anywhere in the world, locking eyes with the porn star of your choice.
Are you going to try out tantra sex?
Whether your partner is beside you or across the world, or you want to incorporate tantric sex into your solo play, know that it isn’t something you’re going to master overnight. It’ll take time, practice, and patience, but once you get started, you won’t be able to stop.
WRITTEN BY
Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and author of her short stories on TheLonelySerb. She completed her first degree in Criminology and continued and finished her Masters in Investigative Psychology, but then decided to follow her true passion of writing.
Discover more of Natasha's Work
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