The Sex and the City series was groundbreaking in many ways; it featured four females as the primary characters as well as discussed topics that had previously been left out of mainstream television. Not only were the four females supportive of each other despite their differences, but they also had some excellent sexy adventures. Through all the laughs, tears and mishaps, we did learn a few things from the Sex and the City series. Here are our 10 favorites:
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All images are courtesy of HBO
1. Sexual Fetishes Are Okay
There were a few fetishes shown throughout the seasons, but one really stood out: golden showers. We find out that Carrie’s date Bill Kelley likes to be peed on. What was revolutionary about this scenario is that instead of the normal fetish stereotype of “gross”, Carrie’s date was a clever, successful politician. It totally shattered the idea that “fetish” means “creepy”.
2. You Should Sleep With Someone Before Getting Married
Charlotte married Trey without having slept with him. Despite both having slept with people before, they decided to wait until marriage to consummate their love. In an unfortunate turn of events, Charlotte then discovered that Trey couldn’t get hard enough for them to have penetrative sex. They divorced for other reasons, but this was obviously a rude awakening!
3. Size Doesn’t Matter, Except Sometimes
Samantha fell in love with James, a man with a 3-inch penis (a hard 3 inches). They even went to couple’s therapy about it, until she blurted out the reason why their relationship would never work. She then runs into Mr. Cocky, a man with an excessively large penis. So large that Samantha can’t have sex with him, despite trying more than once. Although size shouldn’t really be an issue, Samantha lets us know that occasionally it can be.
4. Sperm Is Not Always Pleasant
As much as everyone would love to believe otherwise, occasionally someone might have “funky spunk” (as Samantha would describe it). There is then a whole conversation about what to do if someone tastes terrible – everything from changing their diet to stopping giving head. A bit extreme, but hey – at least it opened up the discourse about it!
5. Anal Sex Is Perfectly Fine
Charlotte is propositioned anal sex by someone she is dating. One by one, her friends pile into her taxicab to discuss the pros and cons of anal sex. While it was more taboo when the show came out years ago, we can always count on Samantha Jones to be the voice of reason: “A hole is a hole”, “It’s fabulous [with] the right guy and right lubricant”. So glad that lube got a mention!
6. Sometimes Pregnancy Happens
When Miranda got pregnant from having sex with Steve, we all learned a valuable lesson about birth control methods. Miranda had admitted to having a ‘lazy ovary’ and Steve had undergone treatment for testicular cancer. Despite the odds, there was still a risk. It was a good lesson to make us re-think those “it won’t happen to me” moments. Safe sex is the best sex.
7. Be Vocal About Sex
Remember the jackhammer scene? Carrie gets jackhammered by Harry’s best man. Unfortunately, in a very relatable manner, she doesn’t say anything about it. She then feels guilty and gives the guy a chance at redemption, and yet again stays silent. At least we learned to do the opposite of Carrie – to vocalize when something is just not working.
8. Neck Massagers Have Other Uses
Vibrators and wands unfortunately still have a negative connotation. Samantha manages to break the silence when she tries to return her wand vibrator, but the store employee insists that it is a neck massager. He lets her exchange it, but he never caves to the fact that his store sells vibrators. Samantha then helps two other shoppers make the perfect pleasure purchase. A little bit of vibrator history!
9. All About The Rabbit
Unfortunately, the writers of SATC pitted The Rabbit against “All Men”. It was treated as a replacement for a man, instead of a wonderful addition to a sex life. However, despite this, it was probably the first time many viewers had ever considered using a vibrator. It definitely skyrocketed the sales of rabbit-shaped vibrators and put female pleasure toys on the map. We wish they weren’t all pink and ‘cute’ like Charlotte thinks they are, but at least it taught us all a good lesson about using sex toys. This was probably one of the most impactful episodes of the entire series.
10. Sex Can Be Healthy and Empowering
The most important lesson from Sex and the City is that sex can be healthy and empowering. There were so many scenarios, both romantic and ridiculous, but one thing rang true: the sex was for the women. Sex doesn’t have to be scary or shameful. It can be enjoyable and empowering. While they mostly depicted heteronormative sex, Sex and the City did wonders for the importance of female pleasure.
Written by
Rebecca Dane
All images are courtesy of HBO